So to my surprise, I just earned the “Aficionado” badge. It’s no big deal, I’m super cool and fun so this kind of stuff happens all the time B^) If you wanna be like me HEY Here’s some Pro Tips for you new players looking to tussle with the big kids: don’t be an anti-gamer. Anti-gamerism is majorly shunned in the Zone, and there’s a zero-tolerance policy for it. You will get smacked with a ban before you can call home and you’ll have to go back to the GameFAQs forums or fill out an appeal form and mail it to the AOL headquarters. #LegalizeGames. NO CUSSING, either. You won’t get banned, but everyone will lose respect for you permanently and won’t let you in on the cool Mario secrets. You can say “dang” and “butt” though. Most of all, stay humble. We all think we’re top dawgs sometimes before you get schooled on the nuances of dialectical materialism and the best cheat codes in Perfect Dark
All that being said, I think discourse.zone needs to step up the late game. Now that I’m at Max Level without becoming a mod or getting hired, I need some more late game content to keep me engaged as a member. I think some dope new challenge badges would keep me in.
Here are some ideas:
Derailroad Tycoon: Accidentally go off on a complex philosophical tangent
Writer’s Block: Write an obscenely long post while you could be doing something more productive
Necromancer: Post in an old thread that everyone forgot about with your hot takes
Animal Lover: Admire a very good animal friend, very good!
Number One Fan: Sing the praises of a game no one else played
Barthes’ Nightmare for the Sega Genesis: Remind everyone that the creator of that thing is a bad person, ugh, you’re right
Arkane Arts: Lament the death of the immersive sim
Queerer Things Yet To Come: Advocate for a queer artist or their art
FromSoft Rains Will Come: Propose a really cool Soulslike that will never get made
Head Editor: Edit the same post three or more times to add more nuance to your argument
You Will (Not) Be Understood: Reference an obscure anime or manga
The Usual Suspects: Talk about cyberpunk, mechs, and hard sci-fi
Scratch That Itch: Post an itch.io link to a neat game
Outta Cite: Make a direct reference to academic literature
Sesquipedalian: Use a really long word, like, way too long
Naomi Kleimbing the Ranks: Critique capitalism for the first time
Austin Rift-Walker: Critique capitalism ten times
Karl Marxman: Critique capitalism twenty-five times
Nevermind: Write over 2,000 words and then decide not to post it
Punishment: Make a slew of puns, and get banned for it, nerd
I am going to be the queen god dang it. Nothing can stop my meteoric ascent but my own hubris.
