Bad Smells and Where to Sniff Them

Earlier today I was cleaning out the fridge, which inlcuded disposing of rancid milk and old oj. I was in a rush, and decided to make the call to dump them both into the sink at the same time. That was some bad smell if I ever smelt it. Try to top that bad smell. Please.

I mean, shit, right?

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Actually, no

a year old can of lime a rita

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The smells cant come from your body, humans are inherently the grossest thing on this planet so thats cheating

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I worked a few years at a bottle depot and every once in a while got the pleasure of counting restaraunt/bar orders. This meant pulling black bins full of recyclable drink containers, and whatever anyone else put into it out from sitting in the sun for days, then dumping it all over a table and sorting it.
It’s a wonderful mix of cigarette butts soaked in beer with juice and bits of meat and seafood, and maybe something else too, left out in a black bin in the sun for too fucking long. Somehow it was made better by the whole "hunting for whole bottles in a table full of broken glass thing"
I know I just wrote the same thing twice, but let’s just pretend that’s gonna make up for my lack of descriptive language.


If you go whale watching, you will eventually have the pleasure of seeing some whales. If you get reasonably close and a whale comes up and blows, you will have - even at distance - a sensory experience you are unlikely to forget.

It smells like a giant animal ate a bunch of fish and shellfish and garbage, stored it inside its body in a nice warm, acidic chamber, and then ejected it straight into your mouth. It smells like the power went out at a fish market for a week, and somebody tried to mop up the mess using a bunch of dirty diapers. It is the most noxious smell I have ever smelled, but it also wasn’t that bad, per se, because it was cool to see some whales doing their thing and be out on the water and all that.


My dog is having stomach problems and her farts are some of the worst shit I have ever smelled in my life.


I used to work as a janitor at a mall. We would throw all the trash into a large compactor, and keep compacting the trash until the machine was fulll. That would usually take a month or so, which means every time you opened the compactor door you were smelling many bags of days old food court food and other trash. “Thankfully” I smoke and can barley smell anything, but I remember a few of my coworkers almost throwing up a few times. And those bathrooms…

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I used to do dishes at a sushi restaurant in a strip mall, which was bad enough, but what made it worse was that each restaurant used the same dumpster, so I can sympathize with your more scent sensitive coworkers.

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I feel like anyone who ever worked in the food industry has some ‘bad smell’ experience. The first job I had was washing dishes at an Italian resteraunt. Stagnant water and grease was my cologne for a year.

What if it’s someone else’s body?

One time, working at a fancy chain restaurant that shall not be named but does serve fusion asian foods, I took a five minute break to use the restroom.

My shitting and playing of fallout: shelter was almost immediately interrupted by a man rushing in and very loudly projectile vomiting into the urinal directly next to me.

Holy shit. I have no idea what that man ate or drank to cause this upset, all I know is that that bathroom was rank for the rest of my shift. I guess the gay was okay though because immediately after releasing his insides all over a urinal, he made a call on his cell phone and sounded remarkably casual about the whole thing.

I have a masters degree in organic chemistry. The smells I encountered there will haunt me forever.

The worst offender was, without a doubt, pyridine. An organic compund with a deceivingly simple structure, it smells like death, after a month long heatwave without a shower.

The smell is an unholy combination of the sharpness of organic solvants like ether or acetone, with the “richness” of rancid fat. The result is a smell which both pierces, making your eyes water, and fills your whole nose and mouth.

And it lasts, holy fuck it lasts.


New playmats. Yeah, like for Magic. They REEK. They smell like a combination of days-old corpse, rotting ass, and compost. They will also spread that particular stench to whatever room they are stored in, any nearby rooms, and any rooms connected via a ventilation system.

I don’t know if they still smell like that by the time they make it to the consumer, but they sure smell like that in the warehouse that’s shipping them out. I can’t imagine what it must be like to manufacture those. I imagine the people working in that environment have had their sinuses melt out by the end of the first week.


Durians are some of the foulest-smelling edible things I’ve ever smelled

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Yay, more for me!


I don’t know what goes on in dogs’ digestive systems but I’ve caught some fucking ghastly ones in my time.


Surströmming is high on my list. And these guys’:


After a quick google I can confrim I would never willingly be around that

What kind of god creates a being whose reproductive organs are an inch from where they defecate? Could god have workshopped that a little more?

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Not only that but the reproductive organ on one side doubles as a liquid waste disposal valve.

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