Do you think he actually prefers to go by James Buffet now

but he just doesn’t know how to bring it up to anyone and feels like he’d be taking away the joy he gave people as jimmy

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he’s probably down for whatever, as he is obscenely wealthy and sings songs about hamburgers

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dude just needs to buy a new fuckin salt shaker already

Yes, but he pronounces it with a silent T.

As long as he doesn’t change his middle name to “All-You-Can-Eat” I’m fine with it

So long as I don’t end up at Joe’s Crab Shack instead

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twist: his government name is actually Jimothy

I hear that dude likes really expensive hats.

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he’s not griffin mcelroy

James Jimmy John’s Buffet

You might be tricked into thinking that there is no appreciable difference between the monikers, but let me assure you that there lies a gulf between the two.

On one coast—low expectations, fulfilled with aplomb.

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On the other—desolation.

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You know whats a really weird word?

Buffet

his full name is James Jacob Jingleheimer Buffet, and his name is my name too