Do Your Eating/Gaming Habits Change When Your Partner(s) Goes Away?


#1

My wife is going to visit her homeland in Eastern Europe for a couple of weeks and I already feel the wantful pangs of what I call TSL (Temporary Single Lifestyle).

In real life, I do all the cooking, we eat very healthy for the most part and we spend our nights together doing fun things and I really don’t play video games daily. If I play at night it’s usually in a half hour to 45 minute burst before bed.

In TSL I find myself doing a LOT more gaming at night and, honestly, eating a lot more shitty food and/or things she doesn’t like. I often wonder if this is a reversion to my truest nature or if it’s just something I do because I don’t get to do it a lot. I regress to childhood foods (I make Sloppy Joes for god’s sake…) and binge play games for hours, staying up later than usual, too. These aren’t things my wife has ever tried to stop or discourage me from doing anything, they’re just things I’ve given up as I got older, had more responsibility and my metabolism slowed to a crawl.

What about you? Do those of you who cohabitate with a long term partner or partners find yourself making poor-ish choices like this during TSL? What are your changes in habits? What are the guilty pleasure foods yourself indulging in that you might not otherwise? Do your gaming habits change?

I know someone is going to say, “Actually, when left to my own devices, I exercise a lot more and go vegan and usually raise money for charity” and I’m going to feel like a real asshole :wink:


#2

I always turn to shit when on my own, though live with my parents at the moment. There’s all sorts going on if they’re away on holiday: I love cooking for people and no longer have that; no external expectations of basic human routines, and no guaranteed social contract.

They’re away on holiday soon for a few weeks so I need to try to get my shit together. I plan on wiping my computers and basically removing temptations.


#3

I’m really sorry to hear that. That has to be very tough-- being outside your own comfortable routines. I sincerely hope things improve for you.


#4

Cooking for 1 can be tough, so for me, single person lifestyle involves a lot more takeout. And pizza.

I can’t say my gaming style changes that much. I have found that as I get older I don’t always have to play games all the time. I might play a little more to pass the time if no one is in the house. I will tend to binge watch TV more if I don’t have to share the big TV :slight_smile:


#5

My eating and gaming habits revert back to single me the moment my partner is gone for an extended weekend or away for a week of work.

She has a intolerance to cow’s milk, but we are able to eat cheese made out of sheep’s milk or goat’s milk. The first night she is gone, I get a pizza from our favorite pizza place, with all of my favorite toppings. From there, I make sure the dog is walked and entertained, and it is game time, and that is pretty much it. I’ve always been a hermit, but my partner brings out the extrovert in this introvert, and I think of it as a good recharge time. (although not healthy with all the cheesey food I put down over the course of 2-3 days) :smiley:


#6

On a recent Beastcast Vinny Caravella talked about eating like absolute garbage when his family was away. Basically housing an entire Dominos large pizza, breadsticks, and soda in one sitting. That’s pretty much me. I eat reasonably and healthy most of the time, but when my wife is away, I become a pizza demon eating way more than anyone should. Gaming habits don’t change too much, as I find it difficult to sit more than an hour or two at a given time, but number of sessions typically increases somewhat due to boredom.


#7

Ha! I listened to that podcast too and was getting sick just listening to it! hahahaha. I love Vinny so much. Out of any “celebratory” I think it would kill me most to find out he wasn’t a good dude. He seems to funny and likable.


#8

This could be a whole other thread, but I’m with you about recharging. I LOVE my wife-- we were together 13 years before we even got married-- but I’ve always been a very solitary person. Having alone time really does recharge my battery.


#9

I’m married and have a 5 yr old and a 1 yr old. When they’re away, how low I slide kinda depends on the duration and the timing. During the week, not a whole lot changes other than I’ll probably get a large pizza to eat for the next 3 meals and I won’t have to clean the living room every night (I clean it once and it stays clean! It’s like magic). I don’t actually end up with much more free time after the work day because I usually run a few errands or take care of a thing or two that I’d been putting off.

If they’re gone for a weekend, though, I become a total garbage person for those few days. Sleep in until noon or later, eat massive amounts of takeout, drink beer in the shower, binge Giant Bomb streams, fall asleep on the couch, and just do absolutely nothing for hours. After all is said and done, I usually don’t get a whole lot more video gaming done. Paradoxically, once I actually have the time to binge a game or two, I generally don’t feel motivated enough to put in the effort. I do, however, tend to get more board gaming in since it’s much easier to spontaneously devote 3+ hours to a social thing.


#10

I admit with absolutely no pride that I’m going for “Total Garbage Person” for a couple days as a GOAL.


#11

I tend to watch movies that she doesn’t like, horror and samurai and stuff, and I play a lot more console games. We only have the one TV and I usually feel bad about hogging it. I eat the same stuff, just more leftovers, because cooking is an enjoyable process for me.

Mostly I get bored and lonely and talk to the dogs even more than usual.


#12

I talk to my cat SO much when she’s gone. And good call on the horror movie-- she’s waaay not into horror movies and the only two tattoos I have are stills from Night of the Living Dead and Dawn of the Dead if that tells you anything.


#13

When my partner is away, my game time definitely goes up, if for no other reason being bored, and trying to fill the time. My eating habits also can go to crap. Cooking for one is not super fun, and I often go to the path of least resistance (delivery/takeout). Pizza Hut/Dominoes boxes tend to accumulate in the times that she’s away for work (thankfully, it’s not that often).


#14

Before I am accused of libeling my wonderful life partner, she likes samurai movies fine but she has trouble with subtitled films in general because of dyslexia, so we tend not to watch them very much because they’re a lot of work for her to watch.


#15

We moved in together a few months ago so I’m still adjusting my gaming habits. I usually block out a nice chunk of hours to play if she’s out of town though.


#16

Two years ago my wife and our two kids spent the weekend at the in-laws.

During that time I ate out at restaurants I wanted to try but wouldn’t DARE take my kids, went to some sports games, and just like, went shopping by myself because trying to buy myself a pair of nice pants while juggling two kids (even with a partner helping!) is a particular kind of hell. Like Emuprime said above it’s really wonderful to experience the magical mundane moments of life like walking around a mall and not worrying about your toddler flinging herself down a flight of stairs because she’s super into showing you how “good” she is at walking.

Before kids my wife would sometimes leave me for the weekend for conferences. There was a pattern, I guess.

  1. Well, this is nice, so quiet. Maybe I’ll watch a movie.
  2. Hm, I never drink rum. Maybe just one rum and coke
  3. [3 rum and cokes later] this house is dirty i should clean
  4. [put away some dishes] cleaning is hard, i’m going to lie down
  5. [wake up startled at 2 am] this is a comfortable couch

And so on. Occasionally there were some video games in there too but mostly I watched movies she would never want to watch and try to mix chores and drinking. My only garbage tendency would be to buy a pint (or two…) of Ben and Jerry’s.


#17

This sounds painfully familiar.


#18

The last time my family went out of town for a week, there was definitely more than one night I slept on the couch because going all the way upstairs to go to bed didn’t seem worth the effort. In my defense, we have a very comfortable couch.


#19

I don’t do this, but that’s because my partner and I are long distance. If I went into a slump every time I was alone, I’d get nothing done. I’m incapable of being that way. Seeing the laundry pile up makes my skin itch and I can’t stand too many dishes in the sink. My partner tends to throw himself into work when I’m not visiting and the basement suite turns into a bit of a mess, but I mostly blame his parents for using it for storage and having too much crap.

I do play a lot of video games, but that’s because I’m usually playing them with my partner or like, with other friends.


#20

I’m so with you both on recharging in solo time while my spouse is away. Of course, just how I spend this time has changed significantly since we became parents. She has had quite a bit of work travel lately, so our son and I have a lot of time taking care of one another, and we do really well: we both get some solo time every day to do our own things, and while it’s not the same as before, it’s still recharging: We often do some parallel game playing after dinner, and I catch up on my solo TV or game time after his bedtime. I think it’s easy for this thought to come across in a bad way, but I think I do better when I have this alone time that’s just mine, not negotiated or navigated or co-habited – whether it’s just cooking by myself, gaming, or sitting on the porch as it gets dark. I’m re-charged when she gets home again, happy to be with her again and happy to have a partner helping with our kiddo once again.

I don’t have to share the avocados when I’m making my own tacos, too.